Everyone experiences periods of hardship and struggle throughout their life. It’s something we can identify with on a fundamental level. That is why stories of others triumphing over life’s challenges is so inspiring to us. By rooting for them, we also root for ourselves!
As a life coach, I am a story keeper of sorts. I am honored when my clients share their lives with me and take their right to privacy very seriously. What I am sharing with you today – with the permission and at the explicit request of the author – is the journey of a strong and courageous women. I hope you find it as inspiring as I have.
Lena’s Story
I came to this country from Russia in 1979, 32 years ago. I did not speak any English and only a little French and Italian. I was married and my son was five years old. That is where my journey began…
I did not know a word of English when we arrived. After two months in an immigration program to help us assimilate, I was my own. I was determined to learn to speak English, at least as well as my son, who picked it up quickly by playing with kids in the neighborhood. I was dedicated when it came to my studies and very resourceful. Everyday I walked with a dictionary under my arm. Every night I reviewed the new list of words I had learned.
Within four years, I had a new career as a manicurist and pedicurist and could carry on comfortable conversation. I was building confidence in my professional life and that felt good. At the same time, I was battling verbal and physical abuse at home. I had been abused from the time I was a young child, first from my father, then from my husband and father-in-law. I did the best I could to take care of myself and protect my child. The living conditions were horrible. I was in a constant in a state of fear. I felt like a doormat and I was too ashamed to confide in anyone about it.
Despite what was happening, I tried very hard not to fall apart. I am a defender, a fighter, a survivor and a believer. There is always hope.
I would say to myself. “Just don’t give up!”
Some days my whisper was so faint I could barely hear it, but I always knew it was there.
I learned a lot from my clients during this time. My appointments were live workshops for me. My clients educated me about so many different things. Many also left their signature on my heart. I carry that with me, and the knowledge, that became my power. After 30 years of marriage and multiple hospital stays, I made a decision that changed my life: I left my husband. This was a difficult time for me. It took me a long time to feel like a person again. I had lost my sense of self and had to find it again.
I went to therapy and worked very hard to resolve my issues, anger and frustration. I kept growing as a person. I was very determined to prove to myself that I could take care of myself, that I was capable of doing many things. And possibly opening the door to even more! From everything I learned, experienced and achieved, I built a strong character.
I do not see myself as a Victim anymore, but an Advocate. I am a strong and courageous woman. When fear threatens to take hold of me, I fight it. And I win! I am a joyful, peaceful person now, and that as my greatest accomplishment.